What it means to be a mom by day and graphic designer by night

This is my standard response to the common icebreaker question when meeting new people, "So what do you do?" I take immense pride in both of these roles so I always lead with those words, "Mom by day, graphic designer by night," ... as though that made me a super hero or something. I'm sure many of you can relate, trying to balance the demanding needs of family and work. Whether you run your own business and can give yourself a lot of flexibility in your juggling act or you work at a 9-5 job that requires a lot of finagling to stay home during virtual school, I want everyone to stop and pat themselves on the back. Whatever your work status, really anyone who truly is a parent to a child is a super hero, and I just don't mean to that boy or girl. So congratulations! You saved the day again!

Take a glimpse into my "super hero" life. Gain some comfort in seeing you're not the only one out there burning the candle at both ends of the stick. Before I was a parent, I often chatted with other moms who ran their own businesses and tried to figure out how they managed it. However, they always seemed to have older kids so I guess I was charting new territory here. These were some of my discoveries:

• A while back, my day would start with waking up way too early with a two year old boy who just can't seem to sleep past 5 A.M. (currently we've gone full circle on this one now that he's 9 and again we're back to the 5 A.M. stuff.) Now maybe this doesn't sound too early for you, but mind you I'm often up until when the a.m. hours begin. During the next afternoon, if I have the opportunity to follow the new-parent advice of "nap when your baby sleeps" I like to take advantage of it to make up on my sleep.
  
  
• --When my business was in full swing and my daughter was born, I gave myself a one-month maternity leave ... WITH the exception of a small job here and there. Could I really pass up a work opportunity for someone who didn't get my message I was on maternity leave :) I'll say my dedication really made an impression with the clients.

• --In the beginning baby stages when they nap all the time I was able to sleep during some of my daughter's naps and work during the others. That worked great except for the fact my daughter woke up when I laid her down in her crib. She took better naps in my baby wrap attached to me and bouncing her continually also helped. The Solution: After putting baby into my arms-free wrap to sleep, I'd set my laptop on our high breakfast bar countertop and get to work while I stand there rocking and swaying so my baby doesn't wake up. 

• -- I gave my kids an early bed time. Not only did this decision give them more sleep that they needed (at least in my world keeping children up later does not equal them sleeping in later contrary to some well intended adults who are far removed from care-taking little ones), but it also gave me more time to do my work. When my daughter got a little bit later bed time she got "quiet work time" (a.k.a. coloring) in my office when her younger brother goes to sleep. This means she gets some more needed down time staying up later and I still get to Kristal Clear Graphics work early in the evening around 7:30 P.M.

• -On that rare occasion when you need to bring your child with you to a meeting, and you're comfortable the client won't mind, libraries make great meeting venues. I found quiet tables to talk at and fun kid sections to occupy the little ones.

• - When the opportunity presents itself to have a meeting with another business mom of a child in similar age to mine, I've had a business meeting/play date. Talk about a win/win situation.

• -I can arrange my kid activities and business activities around each other so it works for me. I get the best of both worlds.
  
  
• I now utilize my phone's mute button- Ideally, I plan my at-home office phone meetings when I have complete privacy from my kids. However, every so often the child wakes up early from a nap or even though Daddy is playing with them, "THEY JUST WANT MOMMY!" They scream. I do my best to conceal my situation, but I don't always succeed. At first I was embarrassed and apologetic as though I wasn't being professional. However, my biggest surprise was the unanimous number of positive comments people gave me about how much they love babies and listening to their noises. When my kids got older and might accidentally interrupt, my client gave a reassuring comment like, "Yeah, I have kids; I know how it is." What I came to realize is that what I saw as an embarrassment to my professionalism, the other person saw as only an interruption, just like you'd have at an office. The only difference is that that interruption is one of their clients unexpectedly at their door or on the other line that they just have to take. It took me a while to give myself some slack on this issue, but I have to remind myself of all my past experiences where people not only understand, but seem to enjoy the cute unexpected noise at the other end of the phone call.
  
  
• My last discovery: Ask for help. I have two super hero side kicks- Super-grandma and Bat-dad both of whom help watch the kids while I work. Thank you super hero side kicks. I couldn't do my job without you!

So why do I take on this challenging juggling act? I'm guessing for the same reasons you do ... because we love our kids and we love our career. They both make us who we are and fulfill our lives individually in ways the other part can't. At each stage of my children's lives, I don't want to let it go, but at the same time want to move on to the next stage where I anticipate their newer independence will make my career life easier. My advice from a sentimental mom who doesn't want to forget a single memory of enjoying my children grow up, I say, "Live in the moment and make that stage work with your child and career. Each stage has it's challenges that can be overcome."